The Magical Thoughts Part Five- The Awakening

And her mind kept going in circles. Deeper and deeper. That same voice that told her she was not in love with him spoke again. This time loudly "He's never going to come back" it echoed through her mind. It hurt, it hurt bad. But it was the truth and so it was good, although it did not feel good. It was good because now she knew she did not have to wait for someone that was not worth waiting for. She had met her ex Isaac on a saturday morning and he spoke to her in volumes. Not the one who broke her heart, but one of those she had dated before. She never had any emotional attachments to him. That was why they were still friends, good admirable friends. In his words she found the truth, he spoke the truth, although it was bare, sudden, intense, it was the truth. The voice kept on telling her "he's not going to come back". A voice whispered "even if he does come back to apologise to you, what would you do?.... Whatever you do make sure you make the right decision. Yes you loved him... But he might not be the best for you" the voice whispered immediately after she had left Isaac. She remembered his words about this new person in her life "he might be the best for you". Her mind shifted to him, the one who she had sat down with to watch the tree cage the moon. She smiled. This smile perhaps was meant not to last long. In a couple of days she started to have second thoughts about it all. Maybe she could not stand the controversies surrounding this boy, maybe it was too early for the feelings. She was not sure. She stared at him one day and tried to decipher what she felt for him. She felt she had betrayed him because she could not love him enough even after hearing so many stories about him from people. She knew true love knew no bounds, this she was sure of. If truly she was working to fall in love with him, she would turn deaf ears to people. But she did not know why she couldn't stand those words. She tried to find the answers to her uncertainties but they only brought uncertain answers. Maybe she was not ready to commit. Her mind wanted freedom, she was not ready, perhaps, to keep thinking of someone. She was not ready for denial, rejection, betrayal, a little love, distrust. She was not ready for the pain in gaining. She was not ready... She was not ready. THE END.